💌 Weekly: To mom or not to mom

Respect women’s decisions

The Female Quotient
February 03, 2026 • Estimated Reading Time: 17 minutes

WHAT’S ON DECK

Tell Me More: A path to motherhood or a childfree journey are both options that can hold joy and meaning
Troublemaker Spotlight: Michelle Curran, Speaker, Author, and Founder, Upside Down Dreams
Inside Track: Leaders on the move
Dear FQ: I am recovering from burnout. How do I rebuild at a sustainable pace?
Poll the Pack: How leaders make tough calls
NEW 🎙️: Listen to the FQ Newsletter here

Too much news. Not enough conversation.

Every day brings a new headline, another story shaping the way we live, work, and lead.

But between endless news updates, algorithm-driven feeds, and polarized opinions, it’s harder than ever to find the context that helps it all make sense.

For women, the headlines aren’t abstract; they’re personal. They touch our paychecks, our health, our families, and our future. Yet the coverage rarely reflects the nuance or lived experience behind the story.

We don’t need another breaking news alert. We need a conversation that breaks the news down. Introducing Broadlines: A weekly video podcast where real conversation meets real headlines.

TELL ME MORE

The 'maybe baby' bias: why women are penalized, with or without kids

We all know the motherhood penalty exists; the economic and professional disadvantage mothers face at work like lower pay, fewer promotions, and biased assumptions that they’re less committed simply because they have kids. Here’s the twist that’s rarely talked about: women without children are also stigmatized, seen as being selfish and career-obsessed, less warm, and less responsible. Not to mention there's a belief that they are unfulfilled, facing a lifetime of regret. These negative stereotypes can impact career progression as childfree people are seen as less trustworthy overall.

The result? Women are often penalized no matter which path they take. Damned if you do. Judged if you don’t. It’s time we fix the system, not the women.

Research shows that people without children face a subtle, but very real, bias at work. It’s rooted in outdated assumptions about gender roles and family life. A 2022 study by SHRM and Culture Amp found that 74% of childfree employees say they’re expected to work overtime more often than parents, and nearly half say they’re routinely handed extra projects because they don’t have kids. On top of that? They’re often seen as less reliable and less deserving of leadership opportunities.

It’s not just unfair; it’s unspoken. And it’s time we talk about it.

“Do you want kids?” Women are asked an iteration of this an immeasurable amount of times. It is still considered by many to be an appropriate topic of conversation both personally and professionally. But it can be an invasive question because so much goes into the answer of whether or not a woman has a child: fertility, finances, physical health, mental health, the status of (or lack of) a relationship, and lifestyle. A woman may be childfree, where she has actively chosen not to be a mother, or childless, she wants to be a mother but is unable to due to circumstance.

In 2024, the U.S. birth rate reached a historic low, with fewer than 1.6 children born per woman. More women are choosing to delay motherhood, and an increasing number of adults under 50 are opting out of parenthood entirely. Between 2018 and 2023, the percentage of adults who say they never plan to have children rose sharply from 37% to 47%, underscoring a generational rethinking of family, career, and personal fulfillment.

And yet, culturally for women, being a mother is considered the norm. Women who do not have children are often viewed as “incomplete” or “yet-to-be” mothers. Enter the “maybe baby?” bias: the unspoken belief that every woman is a future mother, and therefore a risk. Hiring managers might pass on qualified women or overlook them for promotions, assuming they’ll eventually need time off, eventually scale back, or eventually leave the workforce altogether. And it’s costing women opportunities, whether they’re mothers or not.

Once a woman is in the door, bias can show up in subtle ways. If she says she doesn’t want children, her decision is often invalidated with, “You’ll change your mind.” Or she’s told by a coworker who’s a parent, “You don’t know what tired is,” or “You’re so lucky you can do whatever you want.” These comments aren’t harmless; they reinforce a deeper bias: that women without children have fewer priorities, fewer responsibilities, and therefore should give more at work.

Dr. Bella DePaulo, a social psychologist, speaks to this with her coining the term “singlism,” which encompasses the stereotyping of those who are single. This can lead to the diminishment of a single woman’s accomplishments, because it is assumed that she has nothing else to focus on but work. She shared, “Many people believe that what married people (and people who are parents) have to do in their lives is more important than anything in the lives of single people (or people who don’t have kids).”

Childless and childfree employees are often expected to pick up the slack. Late night? They’ll stay. Big project? They’ll cover. It’s time for employers to level the field. For a workplace to be equitable, it should not be up to company leadership to determine the legitimacy of an employee’s request for time off. All employees should be given flexibility without disclosing why.

Here’s where employers can start:
• Prioritize performance, not parental status
• Offer flexibility to everyone
• Stop assuming childfree = always available
• Set clear, fair guidelines to share the workload, regardless of parental status
• Expand benefits beyond parenting (elder care, pet care, personal development)
• Offer competitive PTO
• Create space for honest, judgment-free conversations

A path to motherhood or a childfree journey are both options that can hold so much joy and meaning. When a woman doesn’t have children her time isn’t worth less. She still has a family. She still has a life outside of work. You don’t know her circumstances, so lead with respect, not assumptions.

Respect women’s decisions to make choices for themselves that are uniquely right for them. Lasting progress can only be made when we stop labeling women and start listening. Every path is valid. Every story is worthy. And every woman, mother, childfree, and childless, deserves to be valued not in spite of her choices, but because of the courage it takes to make them in a world still trying to define her worth for her.

TROUBLEMAKER SPOTLIGHT

Michelle Curran, Speaker, Author, and Founder, Upside Down Dreams

If you want to see a star, look to the skies because that’s where you’ll find Michelle Curran. She is a veteran of the United States Air Force, pilot, and fifth woman to ever fly with the Thunderbirds. She is the founder of Upside Down Dreams, and travels the country speaking to organizations about the importance of persevering, chasing dreams, overcoming doubt, and unlocking potential. Her book, The Flipside: How to Invert Your Perspective and Turn Fear into Your Superpower, was a USA Today top 20 bestseller. She has also written two children’s books: Upside Down Dreams and What’s Your Callsign?

What’s the worst career advice you’ve gotten?

“Quitting is a failure.” Especially in the military, there's this mentality that grit is king and you should never give up, but there's a time and place for that. If you are chasing a dream, particularly if it involves pivoting into a completely different industry, you cannot think that way. It keeps people stuck. You have to evaluate your values, priorities, and goals, and if what you're doing no longer aligns with that, it’s okay to move on.

What’s the best piece of non-obvious career advice you’ve gotten?

For a long time, I had this idea that I would just know when it was time to take a career risk. But I received some great advice that no one ever feels 100% ready.

In my career, I was an experienced fighter pilot; I had been deployed and eventually became an instructor. One day, I saw that the Thunderbirds were hiring. I had never told anyone it was something I wanted to do because I didn't believe I was skilled enough. I read all of the requirements and I met every single one of them. It was the perfect moment of excitement, opportunity, experience, and timing. I still had self-doubt as I had always thought, “I’ll feel ready, I'll get the confidence, and then I'll act.” So, I took action anyway, applied for the job, and it changed my whole life.

What was a heartbeat moment for you in your career?

After 13 years in the Air Force, I had to make a decision: stay, go back to flying in a gray squadron, or fly for the airlines. I decided to do none of those things. From an outsider's perspective, it looks like I walked away from my dream career at the top of my game. But my purpose had shifted, and I no longer had the same goals as I did when I was 20 years old. I was in my 30s, married with a stepson, and my body was getting beat up due to intense flying. So I left the cockpit and set out as an entrepreneur. I knew that my purpose was to use my unique experience of being in a high-performance environment and leverage it to impact other people in a positive way through speaking and writing.

Who is one person you’d love to give flowers to from your career that influenced your journey? What advice or lesson did you learn from them?

I considered applying for the Thunderbirds and I went to my squadron commander for advice. He told me I’d be a perfect fit, and asked how he could help me apply. His belief in me tipped the scales and encouraged me to go after that dream.

That conversation changed my life: working with the Thunderbirds, having once-in-a-lifetime experiences, building my confidence, gaining wisdom, meeting my husband, and gaining a stepson. My squadron commander taught me so much about the power we have as leaders, co-workers, and teammates. If someone confides in you about something they’re excited about, you play a crucial role in empowering them.

Where have you caused some good trouble in your career?

While I was in the Thunderbirds, social media was becoming much more prevalent. At that same time, GoPro’s 360-degree camera had launched and we received permission to fly with them. We were encouraged to share content from behind the scenes and our own lives. I grew a large following on Instagram, but I started getting resistance as the Air Force felt that social media use needed regulation.

I pushed back because in the military, our mission is to recruit, inspire, and connect. I received all of these messages from women who wanted to be fighter pilots or women who wanted to pursue careers in male-dominated industries. They asked for advice and thanked me for being a visible representation that the life they wanted was possible. Several of those women have gone on to join the Air Force, become pilots, and a few have become fighter pilots. Encouraging them and being a small part of their story became my favorite part of the job.

Want to nominate a “Troublemaker” you admire? You can do so here.

INSIDE TRACK

Leaders on the move

Gina Cavallo has stepped into a new role as Chief Revenue Officer at xpln.ai, as the company’s first U.S. leadership hire, following her standout work at Audigent. xpln.ai, a Paris-based AI and ad tech company, is revolutionizing digital advertising by measuring consumer attention, not just impressions or clicks. Gina’s appointment is a testament to her unmatched expertise and impact.
Phoebe Gates and Sophia Kianni, co-founders of Phia, have raised $35M at a $185M valuation just 10 months after launch. Born out of their frustration with online shopping, Phia is an AI-powered assistant that compares new and secondhand options in real time. In under a year, they’ve hit 1M+ users, 6,200 brand partnerships, and 11x revenue growth. This is what purpose-driven innovation looks like.
Maggie Milnamow has been named Chief Commercial Officer, and Paul Josephsen is now Chief Operating Officer, at Betches Media. As Betches enters its 15th year, these leadership moves mark a major step in its evolution from social-first pioneer to entertainment powerhouse.
Grace Dolan has been promoted to President of Sharp Electronics Corporation USA, the first woman to hold the role. In less than a year at Sharp, Grace has made an impact, bringing experience from Samsung, Frontier Communications, and Johnson & Johnson. Now she oversees sales, marketing, manufacturing, and services, following the retirement of longtime President Jim Sanduski.
Meghan Doscher has been appointed Head of Brand and Marketing at MassMutual. She has an instinct for connecting brands to business, bringing people together, and leading through transformation. From shaping brand and marketing at Brighthouse Financial to scaling teams at MetLife, Meghan has consistently shown what thoughtful, strategic leadership looks like.

DEAR FQ

Your burning career questions answered

Carly Davidson of The Female Quotient weighs in:

First of all, welcome back. It’s important to remember that burnout is not a “you” problem, but an organizational failure. Despite that, the process of getting through it unfairly rests with the individual. Much like you, recovery is unique and therefore does not have a definitive timeline. Did you know that burnout is such an issue that it’s on the World Health Organization’s international classification of diseases? So with that said, let go of the guilt and give yourself some grace.

It’s completely normal not to feel “back to full strength” right away. Let this also be a gentle invitation to reassess how you’ve been moving through your days both at work and at home. Where can you create more space? What boundaries or routines might help you feel steadier and more supported? Being intentional in this way can allow for new ideas on how to incorporate more time and space for yourself.

It’s also important to keep the lines of communication open with your manager. This may include asking for more feedback and direction, or more space to operate differently, while still delivering work on time. By being open, you model something powerful: it’s human to have lifestages that are slower and more intentional.

P.S. Got a burning career question? Serve it up here to Dear FQ to score advice from a powerhouse leader in our network.

POLL THE PACK

Instinct and intel: how leaders make tough calls

When it comes to the really tough decisions, how exactly do employees decide? A majority (44%) rely on one simple thing: gut instinct. Of course, there is no lack of information and data out there (which 20% of employees favor) but when data leads to a stalemate or muddies the waters, it might be time to turn to instinct.

Going with your gut or intuition makes use of all your experience and knowledge gained through years of work. In one study on firefighters and military leaders, it was found that in crisis situations, basing the decision on experience led to a better outcome.

It’s a reminder that decision-making is as much an art as it is a science, and that confidence, clarity, and courage often shape the final move.

Mother. Childfree. Married. Single. Ambitious. Emotional. Bossy. Women have been labeled for centuries simply for being themselves. Let’s flip the script!

Xo,

The FQ

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