Is “mommy brain” a superpower?

WHAT’S ON DECK

• Tell Me More: Why “Mommy Brain” Is an Asset

• Troublemaker Spotlight: Melissa Mash, Founder and CEO, Dagne Dover

• Dear FQ: How Can I Prepare to Ask for a Raise?

• Poll the Pack: Prioritizing Mental Health and a Culture of Care

TELL ME MORE

“Mommy brain" isn't a glitch—it's a neurological advantage 

Is “mommy brain” real? Yes… but it’s not what you think. 

80% of pregnant women or new parents experience some degree of memory loss. The non-medical term for this experience is “mommy brain,” but there’s medical truth behind the significant neurological changes a person experiences during and after birth.

Research reveals that pregnancy and childbirth trigger one of the most significant neuroplasticity events in adult life. Neuroplasticity is the brain's ability to change and adapt by forming new neural connections and modifying existing ones. 

A remarkable study captured this transformation in real-time through the journey of neuroscientist Liz Chrastil. When Chrastil and her husband were ready to start a family, she couldn’t pass up the opportunity to study herself. Over three years, she underwent 26 brain scans before, during, and after pregnancy. 

The results? A significant decrease in gray matter—responsible for memory and cognitive function—lasting up to two years post-birth. But what seems like a loss is actually a gain. This shift in brain structure has been linked to deeper levels of maternal attachment, suggesting that the brain is adapting to prioritize caregiving and emotional bonding during this crucial period. 

Additionally, Chrastil’s team discovered that the brain’s white matter connections, which allow different regions of the brain to communicate, strengthen during the first and second trimesters, only to revert back after childbirth. These changes highlight how neuroplasticity is at its peak during this time, making motherhood one of the most dynamic periods of brain development in adulthood.

Though research like this is only now being funded and prioritized, the findings are groundbreaking. Women’s health, especially in the context of motherhood, has long been overlooked. We’re finally starting to understand just how deeply transformative the journey into parenthood is for both body and mind.

So is “mommy brain” an asset? Here’s what the research says: 

• Pregnant women and new moms show enhanced facial recognition and the ability to read emotions. 

• Mothers experience a heightened ability to detect dangerous situations and the urge to nest. 

• Expectant moms are also more alert and better at identifying colors and scents. 

• Structural changes in a mother’s brain can last for at least two years postpartum.

• And this isn’t exclusive to moms. Similar changes, including an increase in oxytocin (which influences social behaviors like trust, bonding, and empathy), have been observed in fathers, too. 

Dr. Hida Nierenburg, a neurologist, says, “This neural pruning during pregnancy enhances the brain’s efficiency, particularly in regions associated with empathy and social cognition. These adaptations are crucial as they prepare mothers to respond effectively to their newborns’ needs.”

Combine the neurological changes with little sleep and returning to a work environment that’s not built to accommodate parents, and it’s a recipe for the reality that, on average, 24% of women exit the labor market in their first year of motherhood. Five years later, the percentage drops to 17%, and after a decade, still 15% have not returned to the workplace. Impactful changes like HR policies, flexible work hours, and lactation spaces can work with new moms, instead of against them.

Bottom line: Empathy is a leadership superpower. It’s time for employers to recognize the unique strengths that parents bring to the workplace and treat “mommy brain” for what it really is—an asset.  

TROUBLEMAKER SPOTLIGHT

Melissa Mash, Founder and CEO, Dagne Dover

After years of working for the legendary handbag brand, Coach, Melissa Mash had a realization: Bags should be working harder. They should solve problems. All without sacrificing style. 

Recognizing a hole in the market, Melissa seized the opportunity to co-found Dagne Dover with Deepa Gandhi and Jessy Dover. 

Fast forward to today, and Dagne Dover is loved by both editors and customers for its best-in-class designs. Melissa has been recognized as a Crain’s 40 Under 40, and she and her co-founders have won several leadership awards, most recently in 2023 when they received Modern Retail’s “Founders of the Year” award.

FQ: What’s the worst career advice you’ve gotten?

MM: When I was 24, I wanted to leave my job and move to the UK to gain international work experience. It was 2008, and the global economic crisis was in full effect. Colleagues in the retail industry tried to convince me to stay at my current role, as many companies were cutting jobs. 

However, I felt that another year in the same role meant a year lost in developing myself and my career. So I quit my job, and three months later, an HR rep got in touch with me about a position in the UK. I got the job. And it changed my life, and led me to come up with the idea for what became Dagne Dover.

What’s the best piece of non-obvious career advice you’ve gotten?

You have to appreciate how differently business people and creatives work, and you have to respect what creatives need. Creatives cannot feel like they’re being put in a box or being told what to do—you have to give them the space and the autonomy to create. I don't think this gets talked about enough!

What was a “heartbeat moment” for you in your career?

Quitting my job to move to the UK—I knew that time of my life was valuable and I needed to develop myself personally, regardless of what was going on in the macrosphere.

Most opportunities in life don’t come to you—you have to create them, and there’s usually a healthy amount of risk in those moments. But if you practice exercising that muscle by putting yourself out there and going for “it,” whatever “it” may be, then you’ll get better at coming up with pivots and new plans when things don’t go according to plan.

Who would you love to give flowers to from your career that influenced your journey? 

I am so grateful for my Coach HR rep, Amba Subrahmanyam, who called me up after I left and told me that they might have a role for me in the UK. That role changed my career trajectory, got me into the business school of my dreams, and also gave me the idea for what became Dagne Dover. 

Moral of the story: Keep in touch with your contacts—you never know when you’ll be top of mind for them!

Where have you caused trouble?

My co-founders and I created a company that was, in many ways, very different from the corporate environments where we previously worked. 

It’s important to talk about how corporate America needs to evolve from the top down. The three of us are all very grateful for our past work experiences, as they shaped Dagne and all the policies that we developed as a result. Talking about aspects of our prior work environments that we want to make better at our own company can feel like we’re stirring the pot!

Want to nominate a Troublemaker you admire? You can do so here.

DEAR FQ

Your burning career questions answered

Vanessa Buenger of The Female Quotient weighs in:

It's awesome that you're advocating for yourself—you’ve already taken the first and most important step. You are clearly ready to take on more responsibility. 

Here are a few things to keep in mind:

1. Track Your Wins: Keep a running list of your accomplishments. A manager once told me it’s my job to “tie my work up in a bow,” and I’ve lived by that ever since. Don't leave it to anyone else to remember your contributions—document it. Make it easy for your manager to see the value you’ve brought.

2. Get Specific: Don’t just say you’ve done well—prove it. Use data wherever possible:

• Did you drive sales or increase engagement? By how much?

• Did you improve a process or launch something new? What was the outcome?

• Did you mentor teammates? How did their performance improve?

3. Know Your Market Value: Research the salary range for your role, industry, and experience level. Come to the conversation with a specific number (or range) in mind based on that data—this shows you've done your homework.

The headline here is: Be specific. Throughout the process, don't be afraid to ask for exactly what you want. The old saying "closed mouths don't get fed" is absolutely true. Of course, shoot for the stars, but stay grounded. Approach the conversation with confidence and openness.

Know your worth. Advocating for yourself isn’t just a skill—it’s a practice. Keep doing it.

P.S. Got a burning career question? Serve it up here to Dear FQ to score advice from a powerhouse leader in our network.

POLL THE PACK

Prioritizing Mental Health at Work: How Employers Can Create a Culture of Care

The results of this poll send a clear message: It’s time to get to work.

More than half (53%) of employees feel unsatisfied with the mental health support provided by employers. Research shows that when employers prioritize mental health and well-being, employees are more creative, innovative, and productive. AKA your mental health matters for both you and your company. 

How can companies support their employees’ emotional and mental health? First of all, talk about it. By making mental health an open and safe topic of conversation at work, you can start to show your team you care. Beyond open communication, here are a few other best practices to foster a work culture that prioritizes mental health and wellbeing: 

1. Rethink performance reviews: Move away from once-a-year evaluations. Instead, build in regular, personalized check-ins that not only assess performance, but also explore how each employee works best, what support they need, and how they’re feeling.

2. Promote your mental health benefits—loudly and often: Don’t assume your team knows what’s available. Actively share resources like mental health days, therapy stipends, or mindfulness tools in onboarding, all-staff meetings, and manager trainings. Awareness drives usage.

3. Empower employees to shape the culture: A supportive workplace doesn’t come from the top down—it’s co-created. Invite feedback, encourage peer-led initiatives, and regularly ask: what do you need to thrive?

4. Flexibility is care: Mental health isn’t 9-to-5. Offer flexibility in where, when, and how work gets done—because life doesn’t pause for deadlines.

Here’s to “mommy brain” magic and mental health days.

Xo,

The FQ

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